Madison Elizabeth

It had been quite a while since I last had Maddie's pictures taken. So, a few weeks ago, I called a good friend of mine that does photography and asked him to set us up. He came and took photos of Maddie this morning and I think they turned out great. Here are just a few of my favorites:

I often ask Maddie if she is my big girl, to which she replies, "no, I da baby!" I suppose she's right about that to an extent. But looking at these pictures says something completely different! I can't believe she is over 2 years old now. I remember rocking her to sleep in her room, when she was only a few weeks old, and telling myself how I would never forget that exact moment. I never have either! Granted, it hasn't been a lifetime yet, but I can remember every detail from the moment she was born till now. So many things pop out in my mind when I reflect over the past 2 years. Mostly, Im just so very grateful that God chose to bless me with this gift. I always wanted to have lots of babies, and ALWAYS wanted a little girl first. I never expected it would be this fun, though! The "world of pink" is as good as it gets and through the disheartening times of pregnancy losses-Im particularly thankful that I do know what it's like to carry/deliver/and raise a sweet baby.

Maddie...you are the best! Daddy and I love you!

Hard Times

Two weeks ago today, I woke up in bed and could immediately tell that something was wrong. I knew, before I even made it to the restroom, that I was bleeding. I was right-and for the rest of the weekend-I experienced my third and hardest miscarriage. Three times....wow. I've spent a lot of time over the past 2 weeks wondering how I even got to this point. How could my first pregnancy be so great, and my body get pregnant so easily...to have then experienced what I have over this past year? It just doesn't make sense to me and I hate every second of it! Im frustrated, upset, discouraged, confused, angry, tired, and the list goes on and on. It's a horrible thing to go through. And yet...that desire is still there. Jaime and I, along with my doctor, have decided to go to the next step. All that means at this point is that we are going to have some further testing done. Those test are going to take place next Friday. The results (if any) will then show us what may or may not need to happen next. Be praying hard. Please.

In other news, my job is horrible and Im surrounded by un-Godly, un-caring people. I've made great relationships with a few of them. But there are others that are rude, and dramatic, and make me completely miserable. I wished I was better at having "tougher skin", but Im just not. And I don't know how to be either. I DO let people get to me. I worry what people think. And that is so unfortunate. With losing another pregnancy, and dealing with the stress at work-I have officially cried every day for the past 2 weeks.

I know this has been nothing but a depressing post-but it's raw and honest. I'm trying to figure out a lot of things right now. Mostly..."what is God trying to teach me through all of this" (i.e. our pregnancy struggles and my discouragement at work). Im praying for guidance, answers, peace and comfort, and strength-just to make it through each day.

Growth

We've been trying to grow a lot of things at our new house and develop somewhat of a "green-thumb". It's safe to say that we have a long way to go, but have enjoyed spending the time planting a few flowers and some vegetables. Here are a few pictures of our latest projects:

We've got peppers!

And tomatoes!

There are potted flowers!

And even a few Azaleas! Our plan is to till up a section in our back-yard and create a TRUE garden. Keep in mind though,we've only been moved in for a little over a month, so for now, this is as good as it gets. Jaime has been spending a lot of time and energy on making the yard look nice. I think he's done a great job and we both hope that we see lots of growth and production out of the things we've planted!

BY THE WAY~

Our most recent and precious production is this:

Ah....two lines have never looked better!

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't equally as scared as I am excited. It's been a full year of trying for a second baby. And also a full year of losing two pregnancies. When that happens, it puts a fear in you that you never really knew before. Im only a little over 4 weeks along-very early-and am calculating this baby to be due sometime around December 25th or 26th. We decided to go ahead and make our news public that so people were aware and could be praying. Praying for GROWTH and development. Praying for peace versus anxiousness. Praying for a sweet and healthy bundle of joy, set to make his or her appearance at the msot perfect and special time...Christmas!

No Pictures, Just Words

Our sweet 2 year old is growing more and more, everyday. Here is an update on all the things she currently does:

-Everynight we have story time, and then a prayer, followed by Maddie going to sleep in her big girl bed. She holds our hands during the prayer and it is completely precious.

-She holds mini-conversations with us. It shocks me how she uses words and forms sentences together.

-She loves to sing. Her favorites are "Veggie Tales", "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer" and "Rock-a-bye-baby". She also enjoys dancing and has a VERY GIRLIE side to her. She has also been known to holler out "shake your booty" to a complete and total stranger, too! We can thank Papaw for that one!

-She's a big helper and actually enjoys cleaning like mommy or "helping" daddy in the yard. I suppose I should probably take full-advantage of this while I can!

-She's not too picky of an eater though she doesn't like things that are mushy-like green beans. She loves raw carrots and will dip anything (and I do mean ANTHING) in ranch dressing!

-No matter what time it is in the day, her new favorite things to say is "Good Morning".

-Her favorite things are animals, babies and anything she can play with outside. She has amazing coordination and I think she is going to be both "girlie" and "sporty"! She screams GOAL after kicking a soccer ball and inevitably throws her bat across the backyard if she misses the ball after she swings. I blame Jaime for her temper!

There is so much more that she says and does that I couldn't even begin to document it all. I love her more and more everyday and am so grateful for my time with her!

As for other news, Jaime is beginning to wrap up the end of his school year and looks forward to his summer. We've taken up a new love with gardening. We are amateurs-to say the least-but are willing to learn and try things out. It's taken a great deal of time just to get our flower beds cleaned out-let alone plant anything. We have done a little though. I planted peppers in a pot and will probably plant tomatoes as well. I have planted a banana tree and some lillies, too. We aren't done yet and we are learning as we go. It's been to experiment and hope that, with time, we actually know what it is we are doing!

As soon as I get a camera battery, I will update more. And this time with pictures!

Spring is Here

We have started settling into our new home and absolutely love it! I was able to get un-packed, just enough, to celebrate Maddie's 2nd birthday-a week after we moved in. It was a simple party but fun and she had a blast! Here are a few pictures of what's been going on recently: